Deputy Editor at Upworthy. Nerd. Feminist. Comedy fan. TV enthusiast. Ally. Fangirl. Hoping to make the world a better place by blogging in my pajamas.

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Currently Living: In Baltimore, MD.
"There’s a big difference, however, between hating a dominant group in an oppressive system like patriarchy and hating the individuals who belong to it. Angela Davis once said that as an African American she often feels hatred for white people, but her feelings for particular white people depend on the individual. She hates white people’s collective position of dominance in a racially oppressive society, she hates the privilege they enjoy at her expense, and she hates the racist culture that whites take for granted as unremarkable while she must struggle with the oppression it creates in everyday life. But Davis also knows that while individual whites can never be free of racism, they can participate in racist systems in many different ways, which include joining people of color in the fight for racial justice. The same can be said of men and women.

The distinction between groups and individuals, however, is subtle and easy to lose sight of when you’re up to your ears in an oppressive system. Of course women are going to feel and express anger, resentment, and even hatred toward individual men who may not have it coming in just that way or to that degree or at that moment. Of course men are sometimes going to get their feelings hurt or be called on to take responsibility for themselves in ways they may not be used to. When I heard Davis talk about hating white people, and when I’ve heard women talk about hating men, I’ve had to get clear in my own mind about how these words refer to me and how they don’t, and it often takes some effort to get there. And as a white male who benefits from both male and white privilege, I’ve also had to see that it’s up to me-and not to women or people of color-to distinguish one from the other. Too often men react to women’s anger by calling on women to take care of them, and in this way recreate the male-centered principle of the very gender order that women, feminist and otherwise, are angry about."
Allan G. Johnson, The Gender Knot (via wretchedoftheearth)
sexism racism misogyny feminism
khealywu:

feministframeworks:

the-uncensored-she:

takealookatyourlife:

“kill myself” was the most common answer when they contemplated the possibility of life as a girl

Yeah, tell me again how misogyny “isn’t real” and men and boys actually “love”, “like” and “respect the female sex”? This is how deep misogynistic propaganda runs in this world. Men and boys are so viscerally contemptuous of anything or anyone who/that is female or feminine, or perceived to be female or feminine, that they would rather commit suicide than to be associated with— or become a member of— the female sex. As Germaine Greer said, “women have no idea how much men hate them.”

they would rather die then be treated how they treat us

I am genuinely horrified and terrified by this, but I also feel super bad that little boy kids are raised in this toxic fucking environment. Being a girl kid has some super great aspects, and it’s… awful that they’d rather DIE than experience it.

:(

khealywu:

feministframeworks:

the-uncensored-she:

takealookatyourlife:

“kill myself” was the most common answer when they contemplated the possibility of life as a girl

Yeah, tell me again how misogyny “isn’t real” and men and boys actually “love”, “like” and “respect the female sex”? This is how deep misogynistic propaganda runs in this world. Men and boys are so viscerally contemptuous of anything or anyone who/that is female or feminine, or perceived to be female or feminine, that they would rather commit suicide than to be associated with— or become a member of— the female sex. As Germaine Greer said, “women have no idea how much men hate them.”

they would rather die then be treated how they treat us

I am genuinely horrified and terrified by this, but I also feel super bad that little boy kids are raised in this toxic fucking environment. Being a girl kid has some super great aspects, and it’s… awful that they’d rather DIE than experience it.

:(

(Source: thevinckanator)

sad gender roles misogyny sexism
"We want to believe that the Internet is different from “real life,” that “virtual reality” is a separate sphere from reality-reality. But increasingly, virtual space is just as “real” as life off of the computer. We talk to our closest friends all day long on G-Chat. We engage with political allies and enemies on Twitter and in blog comment sections. We email our moms and our boyfriends. We like photos of our cousin’s cute baby on Facebook. And if we’re writers, we research, publish and promote our work online. My office is a corner of my apartment, and my laptop is my portal into my professional world. There’s nothing “virtual” about it."
harassment sexism misogyny feminism internet
"

Two weeks ago a man in France was arrested for raping his daughter. She’d gone to her school counselor and then the police, but they needed “hard evidence.” So, she videotaped her next assault. Her father was eventually arrested. His attorney explained, “There was a period when he was unemployed and in the middle of a divorce. He insists that these acts did not stretch back further than three or four months. His daughter says longer. But everyone should be very careful in what they say.” Because, really, even despite her seeking help, her testimony, her bravery in setting up a webcam to film her father raping her, you really can’t believe what the girl says, can you?

Everyone “knows” this. Even children.

Three years ago, in fly-on-the-wall fashion of parent drivers everywhere, I listened while a 14-year-old girl in the back seat of my car described how angry she was that her parents had stopped allowing her to walk home alone just because a girl in her neighborhood “claimed she was raped.” When I asked her if there was any reason to think the girl’s story was not true, she said, “Girls lie about rape all the time.” She didn’t know the person, she just assumed she was lying…

No one says, “You can’t trust women,” but distrust them we do. College students surveyed revealed that they think up to 50% of their female peers lie when they accuse someone of rape, despite wide-scale evidence and multi-country studies that show the incident of false rape reports to be in the 2%-8% range, pretty much the same as false claims for other crimes. As late as 2003, people jokingly (wink, wink) referred to Philadelphia’s sex crimes unit as “the lying bitch unit.” If an 11-year-old girl told an adult that her father took out a Craigslist ad to find someone to beat and rape her while he watched, as recently actually occurred, what do you think the response would be? Would she need to provide a videotape after the fact?

It goes way beyond sexual assault as well. That’s just the most likely and obvious demonstration of “women are born to lie” myths. Women’s credibility is questioned in the workplace, in courts, by law enforcement, in doctors’ offices, and in our political system. People don’t trust women to be bosses, or pilots, or employees. Pakistan’s controversial Hudood Ordinance still requires a female rape victim to procure four male witnesses to her rape or risk prosecution for adultery. In August, a survey of managers in the United States revealed that they overwhelmingly distrust women who request flextime. It’s notable, of course, that women are trusted to be mothers—the largest pool of undervalued, unpaid, economically crucial labor.

"
rape culture soraya chemaly women sexism misogyny queue
"

Men want what they want.

So much of our culture caters to giving men what they want. A high school student invites model Kate Upton to attend his prom, and he’s congratulated for his audacity. A male fan at a Beyoncé concert reaches up to the stage to slap her ass because her ass is there, her ass is magnificent, and he wants to feel it. The science fiction fandom community is once again having a heated discussion, across the Internet, about the ongoing problem of sexual harassment at conventions — countless women are telling all manner of stories about how, without their consent, they are groped, ogled, lured into hotel rooms under false pretenses, physically lifted off the ground, and more.

But men want what they want. We should all lighten up.

It’s hard not to feel humorless as a woman and a feminist, to recognize misogyny in so many forms, some great and some small, and know you’re not imagining things. It’s hard to be told to lighten up because if you lighten up any more, you’re going to float the fuck away. The problem is not that one of these things is happening, it’s that they are all happening, concurrently and constantly.

These are just songs. They are just jokes. They are just movies. It’s just a hug. They’re just breasts. Smile, you’re beautiful. Can’t a man pay you a compliment? In truth, this is all a symptom of a much more virulent cultural sickness — one where women exist to satisfy the whims of men, one where a woman’s worth is consistently diminished or entirely ignored.

"
sexism misogyny pop culture feminism
"Some men get a sick pleasure out of stripping away the “illusion” that women are equal and violently showing them exactly how inferior they are. The online troll population has these kinds of characters in it, but the dominant class is men who don’t get the level of sexual attention they feel entitled to from women, and therefore have concocted elaborate, dogged theories about how women are broken, because they cannot ever allow that women have a right not to like them personally. (Or that if they started acting like decent people, maybe they would actually be more likeable.) All misogynists get upset when women are given attention for their talent or skills; it violates their core belief that women are here to serve. This is why writing on the internet while female means getting everything from laughably delusional men pretending to “critique” your writing while barely concealing their rage to rape and death threats. Particularly if your writing is not upholding the opinion that women are inferior servant class."
misogyny sexism mras queue

Stuff I learn. Shared with you.: Breaking Bad Ended My Relationship And I Couldn’t Be More Grateful

angieup:

image

I hemmed and hawed over publishing this publicly because it makes me look dumb. I know co workers will see it, associates will see it, people who look up to me as a survivor of abuse will see it, and I will look Dumb. But I think that’s okay. I was being pretty dumb and I think a lot of…

One of my co-workers wrote this. You absolutely must read it.

Breaking Bad spoilers within. Trigger warning for abuse. 

breaking bad abusive relationships skyler white walter white misogyny queue
"Too many nerds have basically internalised the stereotype of themselves as ugly, friendless losers and decided that anyone who doesn’t fit that stereotype – particularly women – is a “fake geek”, taking advantage of the fact that being a geek is now “cool”."
geeks geek girls alex hern misogyny feminism queue

itisnotofimport:

Misha lays down the motherfucking law. [x]

(Source: heckybarnes)

omg misha collins i fucking love you supernatural misogyny television sexism misha collins

grrrlfever:

motivation behind misogyny:

  • men maintaining power over women

results of misogyny:

  • rape, abuse, murder, lower pay, less opportunities, general discrimination and loss of power, restrictive gender roles, and much, much more.

motivation behind misandry:

  • men as a group sure do a lot of bad things as a result of their gendered power and male privilege, im not sure that i trust them or even like them.

results of misandry:

  • hurt feelings

(Source: lesbolution)

boom feminism misandry misogyny queue
"Jeez, the song was a joke! Can’t you take a joke? Yes, I can take a joke. I can take a bunch! A thousand, 10,000, maybe even more! But after 30 or so years, this stuff doesn’t feel like joking. It’s dehumanizing and humiliating, and as if every single one of those jokes is an ostensibly gentler way of saying, “I don’t think you belong here.” All those little instances add up, grain of sand by grain of sand until I’m stranded in a desert of every “tits or GTFO” joke I’ve ever tried to ignore."
oscars seth mcfarlane is a douchebag sexism misogyny

#feminismdoesnotmean

bigfatfeminist:

With all this crap lately about young women saying our generation doesn’t need feminism, I think it’s time to take to Twitter and explain exactly what feminism does not friggin’ mean.

Carla Bruni? #feminismdoesnotmean you can’t be a housewife if you don’t want to.

Taylor Swift? #feminismdoesnotmean it’s a women vs. men thing.

Got more? Tweet it.

PREACH. Join us on the twitters. 

feminismdoesnotmean twitter feminism sexism misogyny fundamental lack of understanding of what the hell it means

Gawker's Violentacrez Expose And How 'Buffy The Vampire Slayer' Predicted Geek Misogyny | ThinkProgress

I love everything ThinkProgress’s Alyssa Rosenberg writes but I think I love this piece most of all. 

buffy the vampire slayer reddit misogyny violentacrez creep shaming geeks buffy gawker

For the Men Who Still Don’t Get It

utes4lyfe:

What if 
all women were bigger and stronger than you 
And thought they were smarter 
What if 
women were the ones who started wars 
What if 
too many of your friends had been raped by women wielding giant dildos 
and no K-Y Jelly 
What if 
the state trooper 
who pulled you over on the New Jersey Turnpike 
was a woman 
and carried a gun 
What if 
the ability to menstruate 
was the prerequisite for most high-paying jobs 
What if 
your attractiveness to women depended 
on the size of your penis 
What if 
every time women saw you 
they’d hoot and make jerking motions with their hands 
What if 
women were always making jokes 
about how ugly penises are 
and how bad sperm tastes 
What if 
you had to explain what’s wrong with your car 
to big sweaty women with greasy hands 
who stared at your crotch 
In a garage where you are surrounded 
by posters of naked men with hard-ons 
What if 
men’s magazines featured cover photos 
of 14-year-old boys 
with socks 
tucked into the front of their jeans 
and articles like: 
“How to tell if your wife is unfaithful” 
or 
“What your doctor won’t tell you about your prostate” 
or 
“The truth about impotence” 
What if 
the doctor who examined your prostate 
was a woman 
and called you “Honey” 
What if 
You had to inhale your boss’s stale cigar breath 
as she insisted that sleeping with her 
was part of the job 
What if 
You couldn’t get away because 
the company dress code required 
you wear shoes 
designed to keep you from running 
And what if 
after all that 
women still wanted you 
to love them.

- Carol Diehl

feminism women carol diehl misogyny queue

upworthy:

We couldn’t let an interview quote this epic go without being immortalized in some sort of comic book-y fashion. Get it, girl.

Also, Curator Kaye pestered Designer Jessica until she made this reaction gif for her:

Enjoy.

I have the coolest co-workers. For real. This is awesome.

emma stone andrew garfield sexism misogyny celebs interview upworthy